The perfect person. There are too many people out there this day and age worrying about finding the perfect person. You endlessly search, you'll try meeting new people, you take risks, yet you’ve been hurt so many times that you don’t let anyone in. You’re afraid of failures and letdowns. You're afraid of lies and deceit. Who is real and who’s not. You doubt. You question.You pick apart everyone you come across, trying to mix and match pieces you liked about previous people you’ve filled and shared your life with, yet could never fully fill that void you so desperately tried to create in a perfect person. You place too much hope, faith, and burden on everyone you come across because you’re so eager to find that flawless person, constantly searching for that one person who will bring your life to some sort of meaningful culmination that doesn’t exist.What a lot of people dont understand is that true love won’t be at first sight. It won’t even be at first impression. Overtime it's actually built. From both of your flaws. From the deepest of trauma and the happiest of times. From the failures and lessons of both people. The flaws that make you who you are, the moments you’ve experienced, good and bad, better and worse, from rock bottom to the very top. They all have their place in time. In healing. In moving forward. In rebuilding, both together and alone. People keep trading in real value for things you think are easily replaceable. It’s an illusion. The promise of better is an illusion. It’s the biggest lie there is. Better is a relative to where you are in your life and your path of healing. The harsh battles are where the deepest of bonds are created with one another. Suffering as one, as a team, as a whole, as a unit, or as a single entity. This is where true connection is formed. Your foundation will crumble time and time again if the brick and mortar are made up of your combined trials and errors aren’t there. Physical contact and empty promises, promises forged from delusions of grandeur will only get you so far, before your lack of a foundation causes you to collapse in on yourself time and time again.Don’t be afraid of the building. Don’t be afraid of the pain. Embrace the shortcomings. Embrace the cold. Embrace life. Once you have, you can sit back and marvel at the failures and losses, together.Without them, how would we ever know just how thankful we should be for this mystery we call life.True vulnerability in the form of a mirror image of yourself is where you will find it. Fall in love with yourself, and you’ll find this person. Your truest reflection. Don’t look for someone you can be perfect with. Look for someone you can build with. Someone you can be vulnerable with. Someone you can be your ugliest self with and still be accepted. Take my advice and find someone you can genuinely grow with to the point where at the moment you become in their presence, it feels like you're finally home,Maybe its just me .... but I don’t have the time to entertain fake people in my life. You and I are worth more than that.

An elderly couple was driving across the country.
While the woman was behind the wheel,
the couple was pulled over by the highway patrol.
Ma'am, did you know you were speeding?" the officer said.

The woman , hard of hearing turned to her husband
and asked..."What did he say?"
He said you were speeding" the old man yelled.

The patrolman then asked..."May I see your license?"
The woman turned to her husband again, "What did he say?"
The old man yelled back.. "He wants to see your license!"

The woman then gave the officer her license.
"I see you are from Arkansas," the patrolman said.....
"I spent some time there once and went on a blind date
with the ugliest woman I've ever seen".

The woman turned to her husband again
and asked..."What did he say?"

The old man replied....."He said he knows you!"

I do not know what you all know about PTSD, BUT I have it, and sometime an event will trigger a flash back to where I go into this insane mind place. I have trouble sleeping, my mind races I obsess about what has triggered it, and that is why I am wide awake at 5:20 am my obsessive mind will not let me sleep. I tried, but woke up shaking, and can not get back to sleep. I got 2 hrs sleep. That is better than the last time it triggered. Back then it lasted a week and I only got an hour sleep a day for the first 72 hrs of it. Let me tell you first-hand, lack of sleep is not good for anyone. I compounded my messed up mental state, and I really was not good to be around for a week. I really hope this one does not last that long.
Anyone who does not like this blog : DO NOT READ IT OR KEEP YOUR OPINION TO YOURSELF, BECAUSE FOR ONCE I WILL DELETE ANYTHING NEGATIVE POSTED. IU AM IN A BAD STATE OF MIND RIGHT NOW AND WILL NOT BE AS OPEN MINDED ABOUT NEGATIVE POSTS AS I USUALLY AM. ANYTHING NEGATIVE, KEEP IT TO YOUR SELF.
On the other hand, if anyone else has ptsd, and you know a way for me to get control of this latest episode, feel free to tell me. Helpful things will be appreciated.

I feel like Dorothy, right after Toto pulled back the curtain, and reviled the REAL whizard of oz was not great or powerful. He was just a mere mortal with the same flaws as anyone else,and not the GREAT AND POWERFUL WIZARD OF OZ. It seems when we put or heros on too high of a platform, it makes a terrible mess when they come crashing off and shatter into pieces. It has become more apparent to me that trust is an illusion, ith lots of smoke, and curtains to cover the real truth behind the curtains. Once the curtain is pulled back and you see the truth, there is no way to unsee it.

Always be prepared for any job you take on. One should always know any rights, rules, and obligations of a job before taking it on. NOW that having been said: A certain someone and she knows who she is, realllllly needs to have a read over the admin guide, before she goes throwing lies around. One can not poach someone WHO IS ALREADY A MEMBER OF THE LEAGUE THEY ARE ASKING THEM TO PLAY IN. Such a thing may only be done IF THE PERSON BEING ASKED TO PLAY IN ANOTHER ROOM IS NOT A MEMBER OF BOTH LEAGUES. Look it up BEFORE you make a skeptical of your self and show how ignorant you really are of the job to which you have been entrusted.
In the words of Glenda the good: BE GONE, YOU HAVE NO POWER HERE.
( And just from me to you, your obsession with me is going to drive you crazy some day. For your own mental state, you may wish to let the past go and look to the future.)

what the fuck game desire, ive had to break every dam dzme of snooker for the past 4 days thought it was suppose to be fair

theres so many people cheating that pool isnt fun anymore , 1 shot an they can make anything an never miss ,hit balls an get perfect for the next ball, i hit a ball an get screwed everytime an play people thats double my level

Albert Einstein quotes about life

Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.”“The important thing is to not stop questioning.

Curiosity has its own reason for existing.”

“I believe in one thing—that only a life lived for others is a life worth living.”

“Where the world ceases to be the scene of our personal hopes and wishes, where we face it as free beings admiring, asking, observing, there we enter the realm of art and science.”

“Although I am a typical loner in daily life, my consciousness of belonging to the invisible community of those who strive for truth, beauty, and justice has preserved me from feeling isolated.”

“Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.”

“All religions, arts, and sciences are branches of the same tree.”“A table, a chair, a bowl of fruit, and a violin; what else does a man need to be happy?” 

“Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.”

“He who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead; his eyes are closed.”

“A happy man is too satisfied with the present to dwell too much on the future.”

“Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value.”

“I speak to everyone in the same way, whether he is the garbage man or the president of the university.”

 “Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.”

“We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.”

“I am enough of an artist to draw freely upon my imagination. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.”

“The most beautiful experience we can have is the mysterious.”A question that sometimes drives me hazy—am I or are the others crazy?”

“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existence.”

“Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts.”

“I believe in standardizing automobiles. I do not believe in standardizing human beings.”

“A man should look for what is, and not for what he thinks should be.”

“I am by heritage a Jew, by citizenship a Swiss, and by makeup a human being, and only a human being, without any special attachment to any state or national entity whatsoever.”

“Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.” “I believe in intuitions and inspirations. I sometimes feel that I am right. I do not know that I am.”

“My passion for social justice has often brought me into conflict with people, as has my aversion to any obligation and dependence I did not regard as absolutely necessary.”

“A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new.”

 “Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.”

“The greatest scientists are artists as well.”

“Science can flourish only in an atmosphere of free speech.”

“It occurred to me by intuition, and music was the driving force behind that intuition. My discovery was the result of musical perception.”

“I would teach peace rather than war. I would inculcate love rather than hate.”

“I have no special talent. I am only passionately curious.”

“If I were not a physicist, I would probably be a musician. I often think in music. I live my daydreams in music. I see my life in terms of music … I cannot tell if I would have done any creative work of importance in music, but I do know that I get most joy in life out of my violin.”

“My passion for social justice has often brought me into conflict with people, as has my aversion to any obligation and dependence I did not regard as absolutely necessary.”

“One thing I have learned in a long life: that all our science, measured against reality, is primitive and childlike—and yet it is the most precious thing we have.”

Your Name Is Holy through the Good and Bad times...
Your Name Is HOLY-Holy Forever!!!

Lyrics:
A thousand generations falling down in worship
To sing the song of ages to the Lamb
And all who’ve gone before us and all who will believe
Will sing the song of ages to the Lamb

Your name is the highest
Your name is the greatest
Your name stands above them all
All thrones and dominions
All powers and positions
Your name stands above them all

And the angels cry, Holy
All creation cries, Holy
You are lifted high, Holy
Holy forever

If you’ve been forgiven and if you’ve been redeemed
Sing the song forever to the Lamb
If you walk in freedom and if you bear His name
Sing the song forever to the Lamb
We’ll sing the song forever and amen

Hear your people sing, Holy
To the King of Kings, Holy
You will always be, Holy
Holy forever

You will always be, Holy
Holy forever!!!
https://youtu.be/IkHgxKemCRk

HE'S A BIG BOY: I really hate when someone says these words to me when I am worried about a friend. It is like they think when someone reaches a certain age that they should know everything, even if they have healthy conditions. I had a friend in fl, and he had copd. I worried about him a lot, and his estranged wife would say to me, HE'S A BIG BOY, when I would try to get her to check in on him. I felt like she no longer cared if he lived or died. How do you have 2 kids together and not care a little if your babies' daddy is ill?
I have a few friends with diabetes, and one specific friend has a bouncy kind. Even the doctor does not know why, it will suddenly go from a high rate to a log rate and vice versa without warning. I have learned to see some signs when his is out of wack, but what many people do not understand sometimes is the person it is happening to sometimes can not see it coming.. His type of diabetes, the blood sugar changes so rapidly that sometimes there is no warning signs of it going up or down. I have seen it happen, he can be talking to me coherently and then suddenly he will be all spaced out and not following the conversation at all. The main reason I am writing this blog is someone said to me , when I voiced concern about him: HE'S A BIG BOY, HE SHOULD KNOW THE SIGNS. How do you know the signs when it shifts so rapidly that you do not see it coming, and it muddies your thoughts when it does to the point of not being able to follow the conversation ?